ON HOLD

I'm both sad and relieved to tell you that the wedding is on hold.

I am frustrated with the situation. I am now officially divorced but Lee is having no end of troubles with his. He is not in control as she is divorcing him but we are paying all of the costs. We have decided to get all of our money back and go on holiday.. once the baby is born we will start the proceedings again but he will be divorcing her so we will at least know what is going on. Without going in to all of the details it's taken a long time to get to the point where I just don't care anymore. I so wanted to be married before the baby was born but I don't want it like this. I want it to be special, I want to be able to PLAN!

So... that's it! done, no wedding, big or small. Possibly a very nice holiday though so... every cloud!

Screw City Hall

Well... As you know our second choice of wedding venue was Sheffield City Hall. It was my Mums idea which I fought at first but the more I looked at it the more I came around to it. The building is beautiful, the surroundings very picturesque, would get some great shots of th day by the fountain or the local botanical gardens. My parents and a couple of friends could attend.. it seemed a good choice. So it was decided. I happened to email the Hall today and request a brochure, I wanted to see the rooms, costs etc, and was told our party was too small. Apparently their rooms are too large for such a small ceremony. Huh! 

I must say I was never in love with City Hall as our venue, I wasn't dying to get married there, it just seemed to please everyone else and I didn't hate it. But it was no Vegas.

Vegas was always the dream. It was a tough one 'cause holidays need to be booked, money needs to be saved and these things must be planned. The beauty of a vegas wedding is you can elope at a moments notice with no planning and without telling a soul.. that wouldn't work for us. More frustrating is that Lee is still waiting for his divorce to go to court so who knows how long it will be until we can actually do this thing. ARGH! I'm ready to tear my hair out at this point.

Anyway... All being well we will put some money aside and be able to book the trip as soon as his divorce is final. I do really still love the Chapel Of The Bells, it's so beautiful and seriously fantastic value. 

I will update soon.. in the meantime I'm going to be uploading more  ideas posts.. just to distract me from the everyday.

May/June wedding?

Frustrated isn't the word!
I found out this week that I won't be divorced until January or February at the latest and Lees divorce could be 2 or 3 months later still... ugghhh!! Why does it have to be this difficult?
His ex has caused trouble but mine hasn't so I don't know why it takes so long... whatever, we're trying to remain positive.. just means that the chances of me being pregnant on our wedding day are now a lot higher.. especially as Lee has now had his varicocele emobolisation.
If you have no idea what I'm talking about go and have a look at my babymaking blog..
http://missbbsbabybump.blogspot.com/
So anyway... IF I got pregnant over Christmas it would mean I can't fly after June/July as I would be in my third trimester and Doctors don't advise it.. so if we are going to get married in thr US as we sooo want to then it has to be done by like June but I could have a bump and we MIGHT not be divorced!
I had a dream last night that everything slotted in to place and I couldn't believe my luck. I'd secretly arranged for us to be in New York all of a sudden and filled in all the necassary paperwork etc, big surprise.. then I realise we're not divorced yet and I wake up.
I hate being out of control! It's been made so much worse by the threat of infertility.
It means we really aren't in charge of ANYTHING!
I guess as one of my readers said, doing it all in February would have sucked a little because then all of the special occasions you would celebrate every year would be around the same time... but it was special to us because we got engaged in New York this year on my birthday (4th feb) it would have been really magical to go back and get married.
But hey ho, that's life, I guess it's asking a lot to find the man you actually want to spend your life with and be able to marry him when he wants to marry you...
Rant over.. for now!
I get little bursts of frustration now and then and this is the best forum to vent..
Talking of forums... I wonder when that hater group will pick up on all this... baring in mind what they say about other people they would have a field day with Lee and I getting divorced from out ex's to be together... I will no doubt at some point be branded a "homewrecker" whether is be of my home or his but let it be known now.. That's the one thing they can talk shit about and it won't get a rise..it'll piss me off but I won't argue... how can I? it's an unbelievable story but one day I'll tell it to you.. every detail
For now, thanks for listening and keep your fingers crossed for us :)

xoxo

miss bb

Aaarggh!!!!

 I am so conflicted!
You may already know this about me.. I'm very indecisive!
So, to begin with we were going to vegas for sure... that was definitely what we wanted to do.
Then we decided we weren't gonna be divorced in time so we looked for alternatives..
We looked at our local register office (eugh), local cities that may have nicer town halls we could marry in... eg, York/Leeds/Sheffield. At my parents request we looked into Gretna Green (so expensive... thought eloping was sposed to be cheap) and then most recently we settled on London.
We thought if we couldn't go where we wanted maybe Christmas in London would be special?
mmm... Now I don't know. We still don't know that we'll be divorced by then so until we have that locked down we can't really make any solid plans anyway so that sucks.. But we keep going back to Vegas.
Part of the reason we were in kind of a rush was because we thought I'd be pregnant by now.. I wanted to be married before we had a baby (preferably before I was pregnant but at least within the first 3 months).
Now we've had our fertility issues (see baby making blog - http://missbbsbabybump.blogspot.com/) we really don't need to rush. There's always the chance I could conceive but I think we're 6 months off that so we have time to go Vegas after all... but now I'm thinking, can we really leave our families out of it? It was the initial plan but now I'm not sure... I'd love to go just the two of us and come back married... it would be romantic and exactly what I think I want but I don't want to look back in 10 years time and wish we'd had a big celebration. We can have a little party of course I just don't want to do anything I'll regret. I was so sure of how I wanted things that now I've had time to take a step back I'm really confused.
If we could go to Vegas tomorrow and get hitched that would be bliss... part of my issue is the timing.. I hate to wait for ANYTHING and I only have a few times in the next 6 month this trip would be possible.. maybe 2 or 3 dates we could go away for maybe 4 nights. If we put it off more than 6 months (which would be easier) I've a lot more chance of being pregnant... which is a good thing but scuppers my plans.
ARRGGHH!!! I'm a secret worrier and try to seem on the outside like I have everything figured out but in truth I have no idea.. so I'm sharing my nerves with you and asking for your help..
If you could get married anywhere where would it be? Home or away I'd love your suggestions.. I don't want a hotel or a beach wedding but am not opposed to outdoors... I don't want a big family affair but could handle maybe 6-8 guests if I must..
The best time we could do this would be February - my birthday is the 4th and Valentines in of course the 14th so they are potential romantic dates..
If anyone knows anywhere lovely in the UK then fab but I also would love to do it somewhere in America.. don't care where or what the weathers like...
WHATEVER
 help??

xoxo

miss bb